


Not an Animal Person

by Howland



Category: Inception (2010)
Genre: Established Relationship, Family, Fluff, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-05
Updated: 2011-01-05
Packaged: 2017-10-14 10:54:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/148483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Howland/pseuds/Howland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where there are children, there are wacky hijinks.  Philipa and James are no exception.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not an Animal Person

**Author's Note:**

> •You should know, I'm a fluffy bunny at heart and love me my wholesome family sitcom scenarios. With a gay twist of course.  
> •You should also know I do not speak japanese and used the internet to find an appropriate translation for the word 'turtle.' If there's a better word out there, please let me know.  
> •Lastly, please know that I borrowed the idea that Saito's company goes on to hire the members of the team after The Job from author Zoi_no_Miko. Go read their fic. It's way more awesome than mine, seriously.

Saito sighs and shifts in his deck chair, rolling his shoulders back to better settle against the upholstery.

“Papa Saito! Papa Saito!” A girl with a head of long blonde hair bounces around the bushes at the foot of the hill followed quickly by a little boy with curls, twin smiles so bright they’re blinding. Saito smiles back.

The boy has something clasped tight between his hands, wriggling fiercely as it tries to get free. Fortunately, Saito has trained his poker face for years and is very successful at not scrunching up his nose at the children’s prize.

They make it up the hill at a speed only children and olympians are capable of and it makes Saito smile all the more as he leans forward and puts his elbows on his knees.

“What have you found in the river this time?”

For a moment Phillipa is almost bashful and then her grin returns full force. “You’ll like it, Papa Saito, it’s not a frog or a fish this time.”

“Turtle!” James cries, unable to hold back his excitement any longer and he thrusts the squirming creature at Saito. The thing swings its legs back and forth furiously, trying to swim away from the humans who caught him. The man has to admit it’s better than the one eyed toad or the dying fish the children showed him last week.

“Indeed it is. A painted turtle actually, see the colours on its skin and the patterns on its shell?”

James brings the turtle up close to his face until his nose nearly touches the turtle’s back, studying the red and yellow lines with intensity. Phillipa peers over his shoulder for only a moment before turning back to Saito and nodding. “I knew that Papa Saito. Mrs. Bill at school had one in the science room last year. We called him Crunchy.”

Saito blinks but doesn’t question the choice of name, instead he quirks his lips in amusement and reaches out a finger to pet the clawed, webbed foot still swiping through the air. “Have you named this one yet?”

Phillipa opens her mouth to respond when James all but shouts “How do I say ‘turtle’ in Japanese?”

Saito laughs. “Kame.” He replies after a moment and James nods his head in agreement.

“Then his name is Kame.”

“But it’s a she!” Phillipa exclaims with the beginnings of a pout in the turn of her lips.

“No, it’s a boy and his name is Kame.” James sticks his tongue out and begins to turn away when Saito places a gentle hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“James, perhaps if you decide the name for the turtle, Phillipa should be allowed to decide if it is a boy or a girl?”

James looks like he’s thinking about it, but Phillipa takes Saito’s words and runs with them. “It’s a girl then! Kame the lady turtle! Come on, let’s build her a house in the shed!”

Who’s James to argue with that? He grins and takes off after his sister as she starts to run around to the side of the house. Saito sighs. “You must get her some water, Phillipa!” He calls after them as they disappear behind the corner of the porch.

The screen door slides back and Saito hears bare feet approach him. “Who needs water?”

A hand settles on the back of the chair and Saito takes it in his own without looking back, bringing it to his mouth where he kisses the backs of the man’s fingers gently.

Dom snorts with laughter and tugs his hand free, smacking Saito’s shoulder. Saito just smiles and settles back again into his chair. “Kame.” He says mildly.

Saito watches as Dom picks up one of the chairs set up around the patio table and carries it over to Saito’s spot. Settling himself into it with an oomph he folds his hands over his stomach and shuts his eyes against the sun. “And who’s Kame?” He asks, just as mild.

“The children’s newest captive. Fished from the river not ten minutes ago.”

“Oh god.” Dom groans, rubbing a hand over his face. “Not another frog? That last one gave me nightmares.”

Saito laughs and reaches over to rest a hand on Dom’s knee. “I can assure that this newest creature is refreshingly less... Mutant. More reptilian.”

The leg under Saito’s hand tenses and Dom’s eyes go a little wide. “It’s not a snake is it? I hate snakes. Have I ever told you I hate snakes?”

Saito laughs and grins back. “Yes, when we took James and Philllipa to the zoo. You waited for us outside the reptile house.”

“Damn right I did.” Dom says with a nod. “Tell me it’s not a snake.”

“It’s not a snake” Saito’s smile is reassuring and after a moment of studying his face, Dom nods and relaxes a little.

“Good. Then what is it?”

“Kame.” There’s a glint of mischief in Saito’s eye and Dom shakes his head.

“I thought that was what they’d named it?”

“It is.”

Dom frowns. “This is some Japanese thing I’m not getting, isn’t it?”

Saito laughs and chaffs his thumb over Dom’s kneecap. “Kame is ‘turtle’ in my mother tongue. James asked me how to say it and the children decided it was a good name for their newest acquisition.”

“Ah.” Dom sighs, relaxing more now that the mystery is solved. “I can deal with a turtle.”

This surprises Saito, considering how opposed the man has been in the past to getting the children a pet of some sort. “Really?” He doesn’t even try to hide the curious tone in his voice and Dom holds onto a look of innocence for all of ten seconds before he huffs a laugh under his breath and shakes his head.

“I mean I can deal with a turtle for the next few hours before a dramatic and mysterious prison break in which the turtle returns safely to the river.”

Saito smiles. “Of course.”

\--

Two hours later when Saito calls the children to dinner, Dom sneaks out of the kitchen, returning several minutes later with damp cuffs and grass stuck to the bottoms of his bare feet. He washes his hand thoroughly before helping Saito finish bring all the food to the table, and taking a seat.

“Did you wash your hands?” He asks as he puts his napkin in his lap. James and Phillipa both nod emphatically, James going so far as to hold his hands up for his father’s inspection.

Dom nods in approval, giving his son a brief salute which makes James laugh. Saito’s smiling in his own knowing way and shares a conspiratorial look with Dom before he picks up the serving bowl of white rice and asks Phillipa if she would like some.

It’s after dinner that the other shoe drops.

“DADDY! PAPA SAITO!” Dom startles so badly at Phillipa’s cry that he nearly drops the bowl he was putting in the dishwasher. Saito’s at the back door in an instant, opening it just in time for a little boy and girl to come crashing into him, clinging to his legs desperately. “She’s gone Papa, she ran away!”

Saito tries to gently pry them off so he can actually ask them what’s wrong, but Phillipa springs away like she’s been shocked, only to race over to Dom with a determined look in her watery eyes. “We have to find her daddy! What if she gets lost in the woods? What if a _bear_ eats her? We have to find Kame, daddy!”

The look on Dom’s face would have made Saito laugh under different circumstances. It doesn’t seem so funny just now.

“James,” Saito says softly, managing to pull the boy away enough so he can crouch down and look him in the eye. “I’m sure Kame knows the way to river, I would not worry about her. Turtles are very wise creatures and-”

“But I want her back.” James’ bottom lip quivers and the boy crosses his arms over his chest in a pout. There are already tears on his face and more were threatening to fall any moment. Even as Saito draws James into his arms he looks over his shoulder at Dom, raising one eyebrow in askance.

 _How do you plan to fix this?_

Dom looks incredibly guilty.

Small fingers tug on his hand insistently. “Daddy, we have to look.”

From the lips of his daughter it sounds like such a reasonable request. Dom sighs, just a little, and goes into the kitchen to get a pair of flashlights from under the sink. When he comes back he makes eye contact with Saito and they share another silent moment of communication. Saito takes the second flashlight from Dom’s hands and lets his fingers brush over the man’s wrist comfortingly.

The screen door slams, the kids already half way to the woods. Saito places a hand on the small of Dom’s back “I have always enjoyed walking through the woods in the evening.”

And Dom laughs, though he tries not to, as they follow the children into the darkening night.

\--

The house remains empty and silent until they trudge back in at half past nine. Saito and Dom hadn’t been certain how long the distraught children would continue to insist on the search party, but an hour and a half was pushing it. Sleepy and sad, Phillipa rides on Saito’s back while Dom carries James, the little boy’s arms wrapped tight around his neck.

“You really think Kame made it back to the river safe Papa Saito?” James’ watery eyes make contact with Saito’s over Dom’s shoulder and the business man gives a small nod, careful not to dislodge Phillipa’s drowsing head from his shoulder

“I miss Kame.” Phillipa sniffs.

“I know baby.” Dom replies, and Saito turns to press a soft kiss against the little girl’s temple.

They make short work of getting the two kids ready for bed. Forgoing a bath, Dom and Saito just wipe the mud and grass of the children’s feet in favor of letting them get to sleep sooner. Pajamas on and all tucked in, the light goes off in the children’s shared room and the cheap glow in the dark stars pasted to the ceiling come to life. Dom kisses them both on the head and wishes them goodnight, followed closely by Saito who leans over to hug each of them and bids them to sleep well.

The door closes with a click.

“I feel like such a fucking asshole.” Dom groans as he sinks into a living room chair, one hand going to his head to rub at his temples. The benign chuckle Saito gives him is not any sort of comfort and Dom scowls.

“Don’t let it bother you too much. They are young and will forget Kame soon enough.”

“You!” He points at his lover with a glare. “Now even you’re calling the damned turtle by a name. It was just a turtle damn it, probably had diseases. It would _not_ have made a good pet.”

“No.” Saito concedes, his tone mild. “Probably not.” There’s a bottle of scotch hidden away behind the good serving dishes in one of the top cupboards in the kitchen and Saito goes to fetch it.

“Definitely not.” There’s a tone of petulance in Dom’s voice and Saito just smiles, not particularly keen on picking a fight but unable to resist.

“Probably not.”

 _“Definitely.”_

Saito returns to the living room with two glasses of alcohol and levels a _look_ at Dom as he hands one over. “Probably.”

To his credit, Dom looks a small bit chastised, but he does swipe the glass from the other and drink most of its contents in a single gulp, wrinkling his nose slightly at the burn. “You’re an animal person, aren’t you?”

“My family had a white cat growing up.” Saito says, settling himself in the other arm chair and putting his feet up on the ottoman. “My sister was allowed to name it and she was not very creative about it. She dubbed it Shiro. That means ‘white.’”

Dom quirks a small smile at that, his ruffled feathers smoothing as Saito speaks. Then he frowns again. “We can’t get a cat. Or a dog. I’m allergic.”

Once again, Saito chuckles benignly. “I was not suggesting as such. I would not wish to make you ill for the sake of a pet.” The long walk made his feet ache a bit and he wiggles his toes and flexes his arches a bit to try and chase the tension away.

“-but you’re still an animal person.” Dom returns to his original question, now quite sure of the answer, and Saito concedes gracefully.

“Yes, Dom, I would suppose you could call me an animal person.”

The American shakes his head and rests his glass against his temple. “I should have known.”

Placing his half finished drink aside Saito sighs and rises, extending a hand to Dom. There’s knowing look settling in his eye. “Come.” he commands inclining his head towards the hallway. “It’s been a long night for all of us, and I believe you and I have earned ourselves a chance to retire early.”

Dom can’t help himself when his lover looks like that and he smiles, the lines of tension relaxing out of his face. He too sets his (empty) glass aside, and reaches for the hand extended to him. “Well, a bed does sound awfully inviting just about now.”

Saito shakes his head, and hauls Dom to his feet. “After running about in all that wilderness? No, a hot shower is in order before we get anywhere close to the bed.”

And with a laugh Dom obeys and starts off down the hall to the master bath, shaking his head all the way. Saito follows close behind.

\--

At the end of work on Monday Dom asks Saito to pick the kids up from day camp without him, saying that he has some errands to run, and hails a cab. Saito is mildly curious, but both he and Dom have an unspoken agreement to respect each other’s need for privacy in certain things. He asks nothing more than if he will be making dinner that evening or if he should take care of things himself.

Dom grins and suggests he take the kids grocery shopping. “Take your time!” he calls as he ducks into the yellow taxi.

When Saito pulls up to the local community center where the camp his held, Phillipa and James are waiting for him under the bored-but-watchful eyes an underpaid teenage counselor. The children have paint under their nails and are proudly brandishing brightly coloured illustrations of their weekend turtle adventures. Phillipa has made a point of writing ‘KAME’ on both her and her brother’s paintings, complete with backwards K and E with to many arms. Saito praises her penmanship then takes a moment to show her again how to properly form her K’s and her E’s. There’s not much space on the clothesline in the play room where they hang up all the drawings and paintings and restaurant placemat doodles, but Saito’s sure they’ll find an appropriately reverent spot.

Although its sometimes hard to follow what they’re saying, Saito genuinely enjoys asking the children about their day and hearing their enthusiastic replies. Before The Job, he had doubted that he would ever have a family and children which he genuinely loved. Every day now he thanks the extraordinary circumstances which allowed for him to meet Mr. Cobb, come to know the man, come to love him, and somehow become a member of this family. James’ tall tales and Phillipa’s insistence on singing the song she learned at lunch over and over again only serves to remind him of his blessings so he just smiles, car windows down, one arm resting outside the vehicle as the summer day breezes by.

“Can we get ice cream?” James asks excitedly when he realizes they’re headed to the supermarket, fidgeting to try and get his feet under him on the seat so he can kneel up and see out the window better. Saito doesn’t even notice the footprints on the inside of his seventy thousand dollar car anymore, and he makes a face like he’s thinking seriously.

“Well.” He says quietly, the children shushing themselves to listen closely. “I will not tell your father if you do not.”

The children argue about what flavors to get all the way through the store. In hopes to help keep them interested in the task at hand, Saito asks them to pick out the individual fruits and vegetables for the meal and gives them final say on what brand of noodles to buy and what type of bread they should have with dinner. The meal may end up being less Italian and more of a cross-cultural experience, but Saito has no ancestors from that part of the world to offend and he doesn’t much care.

As pleasant as the outing is, a part of him remains with Dom, wherever he is. Although Saito knows his people are very good at scrubbing dirty records clean, it still worries him when Dom is off somewhere unknown. There is always the chance that his past will catch up with him, however unlikely it may be. As good as the man is at covering his tracks, Dom has still made enemies over the years. Powerful ones.

As of yet Saito has not told his lover that he has a member of his staff permanently assigned with keeping an ear to the ground for anyone seeking a Mr. Cobb with cruel intent, and in all honesty hopes Dom will never find out. That is not to say he feels guilty for doing it. He will do anything within his power to keep his lover, and his lover’s family, safe. Saito has always been good at protecting what is dear to him.

James races up to the cart with a gallon of ice cream in his arms, so cold it hurts if the way he shifts is weight from hand to hand as he runs is any indication.

“Good choice.” Saito takes the container from the boy, smiling when he sees its strawberry. Phillipa’s close behind with the most chocolate-y concoction she could find. Judging from the close up photo of the product on the side of the container, it’s something Dom will like as well.

They check out quickly, and load their bags into the cars small trunk before hurrying home lest the ice cream melt.

When they arrive at the house, the doors and windows have already been opened to let in a breeze.

“Here,” Saito picks up the paintings from where he’d placed them carefully in the passenger’s seat. “Go show these to your father.”

The children rush to obey while Saito gets out and walks around to the back of the car. He’s barely managed to pop the trunk when he hears the children shrieking. The bottom drops out of Saito’s stomach, and he is through the front door in an instant. With a racing heart he pulls up short in the living room, his eyes only a touch wild as he takes in the scene before him.

He’s grateful that the children have their back to him as they press their noses against the glass of a new aquarium, but Dom doesn’t miss a thing. He looks startled by Saito’s wide eyes for a moment, then apologetic as realization dawns on him. It takes a moment to extricate himself from James’ distracted hug before he can move to Saito’s side, his look of apology becoming more sheepish by the second.

“You look freaked out.” The American comments dryly, reaching out a hand to to squeeze the man’s shoulder.

For a moment Saito feels irritated, but he lets it go with a sigh. With some theatrics he places a hand over his heart and adopts a put upon expression. “I have always had difficulty,” He begins, taking a deep, staged breath, “telling a terrified shriek from a delighted one.”

Unable to help it, Dom laughs as he reaches an arm around Saito’s shoulder to hold him. The Japanese man rubs his hand up and down Dom’s spine once and kisses his cheek before murmuring “Have you ever kept an aquarium before?”

The American winces. “No, and frankly, I’m pretty sure I’m going to kill everything in there.”

“I won’t let you. I have some experience with keeping fish and I can assure you I will make sure those animals will be fine.”

“Oh thank God.” Dom intones, squeezing his lover’s shoulder. “I’m terrible with pets. Just, trust me on that.”

“And still you purchased this for your children?”

Dom shrugs. “The kids like animals. I don’t know where they got it from, I certainly didn’t instill it in them, but the damage is done. And as far as pets go, I’m less worried about a school of fish destroying my house than, say, a mutt or a vicious cat or a gerbil or anything else with teeth and an appetite for furniture.”

It’s taking every ounce of willpower for Saito to not laugh in Dom’s face, but he doesn’t mean it unkindly. “I can’t say a gerbil would be likely to destroy the house.”

“Did you get us a gerbil too?” Phillipa shrieks and Dom blanches.

“No, definitely not.”

Phillipa, thankfully, doesn’t seem to let that faze her. “Well, the fishies are awesome daddy. Can I name one Mulan please?”

There are times when Dom wishes he could see inside his children’s brains just so he can understand their train of thought. In reality he just smiles and squeezes his daughter’s shoulder. “Sure.” He says. “There are five fish, so you can name two, your brother can name two, and we will all agree on a name for the last.”

James is still pressed to the glass and mutters. “That one’s name is Batman, and that one’s name is Spiderman.”

“No Superman?” Saito joins in the conversation and James nods his head, his nose bumping the aquarium.

“That’s what we should name the third one.”

“But I don’t want to name them after boys!” Phillipa shrieks and Dom decides it’s time for a break. He makes a time out motion with his hands and gently peels his children off the glass.

“Okay, here’s the plan. You two will spend the next half hour brainstorming ideas while I finish setting the tank up, okay? Until then, do not come back in here.”

“Aw, but dad!” Both small voices rise in unison but Dom just shakes his head.

“No buts, now get thinking.” With a gentle shove he propels them towards the living room and they go grudgingly, casting looks of longing back at the colourful new addition to the house.

When Dom’s certain they’re doing as he asked he lets out a sigh of mild relief and turns to face his lover, whose lips are curved gently upward in the business man’s version of a wide grin. Telegraphing his intent, Saito moves forward and wraps his arms around Dom’s shoulders and is pleased when the American returns the embrace in kind. “You are a good man, Mr. Cobb, and a wonderful father.”

Dom shrugs slightly, and opens his mouth to respond with a slight frown creasing the skin between his eyes but Saito only reaches up and places a finger over the American’s lips. “Just trust me, my dear. For on this, I am quite certain.”

For once, Dom does not argue.

“Will you come help me collect the groceries now? I dread to see the state of our frozen purchases should we leave them at the mercy of the sun for much longer.” Letting Dom go only to grab his hand, he tugs the man outside with him for a just a moment.

“Frozen? What did you buy that’s frozen?”

Saito shrugs. “It seems the Kame incident inspired both of us to spoil the children a bit.”

Making their way to the trunk of the car Dom peers into one of the brown paper grocery bags and grins broadly at the sight of Phillipa’s selection. “Mmm, Chocolate. I’m guessing this one was Phillipa’s selection; she’s always had good taste. Tonight we eat like kings.”

“We did purchase more than just ice cream.” The two men each take a bag in each hand and Dom uses his elbow to bring the lid of the trunk down.

“Ice cream and dinner, huh? These kids are gonna end up rotten.”

“Never.” Saito murmurs as he walks so close to Dom that their shoulders brush and the bags they’re carrying rustle as the brush against each other.

“Maybe I’ll end up rotten.”

And Saito laughs genuinely as he opens the door and lets Dom precede him inside. The aquarium is bound to be a new sort of adventure for the lot of them, but as long as he and Dom are working together, Saito’s certain they’ll be able to handle it.


End file.
